• Deborah

Happy Mother's Day: The "Real Cards of an LA Mom"


In case the start-up business doesn’t pan out, I’ve got my next career at Hallmark all tee’d up:

CARD #1 to Me (from my kids):

Roses are Red,

Violets are Blue,

I promise never to get

A Mommy tatoo!

CARD #2 to Me (from my kids):

Roses are Red,

Violets are Blue,

You’re taller than Sophie’s Mom

And you sing Katy Perry songs really good, TOO!

CARD #3 to Me (from my kids circa 2034):

Roses are Pink,

Violets are White,

I’m sorry I thought otherwise,

Because it’s true. You were right!

CARD to MY MOTHER (from me circa 2012):

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

Actually, moms DON’T know best

Their grown daughters do!

CARD to MY MOTHER-IN-LAW (from me):

Roses grow high,

Violets near the wood,

He’s my husband, this is my house, they are my kids

All clear? We’re good?

CARD to MY FUTURE DAUGHTER-IN-LAW (from an oedipal me):

Roses like water,

Violets, the bee.

Don’t think for a second

He’ll love you more than me!

CARD to MY DAUGHTER WHEN SHE’S A MOTHER:

Roses are lovely,

Violets are rich,

Now you’re a Mom,

You’ll understand why some days, I was just a bitch.

(Sorry ’bout that.)

HAPPY MAMA’S DAY, everyone!

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